I'm Wishing My Life Away
by Holz9364
Summary: Jane is handcuffed to Lisbons hotel bed, things got a little out of hand, but it all began with an Avril Lavigne song. ONESHOT, total fluff & crack! Rated T for minor language.


**I'm Wishing My Life Away**

It had been a long day, it had started out with a relaxing walk to work, but then Patrick Jane had happened and the result? It had been a damn long day.

It was 6pm and they were in a hotel room in Oakland, working "undercover" to catch the killer, they knew who he was, now all they had to do was corner him and arrest him.

Jane had wanted to assist, but Lisbon had other ideas. He was handcuffed to the bed in Lisbons hotel room with duct tape over his mouth. Judging by his facial expression he wasn't sure if he should be extremely pissed off or extremely amused by his current position, but he deserved it alright, he goddamn deserved it.

**10 hours earlier**

"Morning Lisbon!" Jane chirped cheerily from his couch when Lisbon walked into the bullpen at 8am, she was late, which was very unlike her, "Tut, tut Lisbon, half an hour late, what will we do with you?" He teased, mock shaking his head at her.

She rolled her eyes, "I'm late because my car broke down so I had to walk to work." She stated matter of factly to the man who just grinned at her.

She took her Ipod out of her ears and wrapped the headphones around it before tucking it in her bag, when she looked back up Jane was looking at her with a mischievous glint in his eyes.

"Listening to your Ipod on the way to work Lisbon?" He asked as he stood up and followed her on her way to her office, she rolled her eyes at him again when she reached the office and sat down behind her desk, "Yes and the problem with that is?"

"Oh no, no problem." Jane said as he leant in the doorway smiling, "What were you listening too?" He asked as he cocked his head at her, she just glared at him and since he knew she didn't plan on answering he answered for her, "Avril Lavigne right?"

She narrowed her eyes at him, "Yes, why do you care?" She asked, crossing her arms at the man in her annoyance. It didn't faze him however he just shrugged, "Fancy yourself as a bit of a rock chick?"

She couldn't glare at him anymore; he had broken through her walls, again. She smiled, "Of course, that's me, rock chick of the century." She said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Jane grinned and stepped forward into the room, she had dropped her guard which meant it would be easier for him to read her, he noticed her tense as he came closer, she knew it too.

"You say it as though it's not true, but I figured out the instrument you played, electric guitar." His grin widened as a faint blush appeared on her cheeks, "You were a rock chick at High school." He said triumphantly and Lisbon just shook her head in amusement as a response. There was no point in denying it to him, he was good.

"So what song were you listening too?" He asked her as he sat down on her sofa, she tried to feign ignorance, "Oh, nothing in particular." she said, but he could tell from the way she averted her eyes that she was lying, for a cop Lisbon really was a terrible liar.

"Liar." He stated as he grinned at her from the couch, "At least tell me the album." He said as he softened his smile a little when she turned her glare on him, why did he care so much?

"I was listening to Let Go, what are you Avril Lavigne's biggest fan?" She asked in exasperation, but he just shrugged, "You could say so." He said vaguely and she raised an eyebrow at him, he smirked, "I have Let Go on my Ipod, very good mix of songs." He complimented before lying down on her couch and closing her eyes.

Trying not to sigh in relief Lisbon made a start on her paperwork, thinking that he was doing interrogating her, but this was Patrick Jane, of course he had more to say. After about 5 minutes of peace and quiet he began to go through the track-listing of 'Let Go.'

"Losing Grip, hmm."

Lisbon rolled her eyes, more in amusement than annoyance, "What _are_ you doing?" She asked the man, trying to keep the smile out of her voice.

His eyes shot open and he shot her a trademark grin, "Well you have issues telling me the song you were listening to for a certain reason which means you're embarrassed about something so it must relate to your life. I am going through every song in my head to try and figure out which one you were listening too. If I'm right I get to take you to dinner."

She raised her eyebrows at him. "And if you're wrong?"

He grinned cheekily at her, "I won't be." He said as he closed his eyes and began muttering to himself once more.

"_Right now I feel invisible to you"_

"Do you feel invisible Lisbon?" Jane asked casually from his couch, "Do I look invisible?" Was her dry retort. "Technically you can't look invisible because no one can see you." He said with a smirk before muttering, "Not Losing Grip."

Lisbon rolled her eyes as Jane hmm-ed thoughtfully at "Complicated" before starting to sing under his breath again, "Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?"

"Lisbon?"

She didn't bother looking up from her paperwork, "Hmm?"

"Do you find anything complicating at the moment?" He asked thoughtfully, she looked up at him, "Working with you." She retorted and he grinned, "Why thank you Lisbon." He said and once more his eyes were closed.

"Okay, not 'Complicated' hmm, 'Sk8ter Boi'. Lisbon are you in-"

"I'm not in love with a skater boy Jane!" She said with a glare and holding his hands up in surrender he moved onto the next song. A little scared of Lisbon he continued his count down in his head. It couldn't be 'I'm With You' Could it? He thought about it for a little bit longer, _"Isn't anyone trying to find me? Won't somebody come take me home?"_ could be actually.

"Lisbon, do you want someone to find you?" Jane asked, not bothering to open his eyes as she turned her glare on him for the umpteenth time that morning.

"Why am I hiding? Did I just kill you?" She deadpanned and Jane laughed quietly, he knew she wouldn't really kill him, but he loved to get her wound up like this. This was only the beginning, when he found out the song he was really going to be in danger.

He quickly brushed off "Mobile" because it was all about not fitting in somewhere new and Lisbon had been here for years and got on with everyone, it could be about Hightower, but he highly doubted it and went onto the next track without singing so much as a line.

"Lisbon, do you-"

"I don't feel unwanted Jane." She told him tiredly and he had to admit he was impressed, she was reading his mind now, well that worried him a little, but for now she was just scraping the surface.

He briefly though about "Tomorrow" and figured she could relate it to him and how he always optimistically predicted something and the worse happened, but Lisbon would have no problem in telling him that, she would use it to make fun of him. Definitely couldn't be "Tomorrow."

He smirked to himself a little as he thought of "Anything But Ordinary" Lisbon followed rules and lived by them as if she would relate to a rebellious song about breaking rules, although when he thought about it _he_ related rather a lot too the song, he definitely wasn't ordinary.

Ah well, next in his mental play list, as soon as the track started playing in his head he grinned and sat up, "Things I'll Never Say." He triumphantly grinned as he pointed at her.

Her blush intensified and she said, "No." Sheepishly. Jane grinned at her, "It is, you were listening to "Things I'll Never Say" Now Lisbon, now things are going to get interesting."

She looked at him determined, "Whatever you say." She said, but he continued grinning as he recited some lyrics from the song.

"Your cheeks do turn red often when I'm around and you think I'm worth it? That's really sweet Lisbon." He took a step back as her eyes turned red, she looked ready to kill.

"You want to marry me Lisbon really? Well Mrs Teresa Jane _does_ have a ring to it." His grin widened as he took a step back, she stood up from her chair, arms crossed, ready to pounce.

"You care about me Lisbon? Well I always knew you did, but it's nice to have proof." He chuckled as she walked closer to him, but reached behind to feel how close to the door he was, he had to admit he was a bit nervous now.

"Jane-" She began in a tone that Jane knew meant business, but he was saved by Cho opening the door and looking between Lisbon who looked ready to explode and Jane who looked rather terrified, "Uh, new case Boss." He said with a slight frown.

With one last glare to Jane that said 'this isn't over' she marched out of the door and breathing a sigh of relief that Cho had come in when he did Jane hurried after her.

An hour later found them sitting in the hotel watching the guy that they pretty much knew was the murderer and waiting until they got the warrant to arrest him. These cases with super rich guys sucked, usually when Jane had a sensible hunch they would act on it right away, but rich guys fined them for arresting them without evidence so a warrant for arrest it was, Lisbon sighed as she remembered the events earlier that morning in that office. Jane had been smirking at her all day and she had decided that she was going to kill him if he kept it up any longer.

Just when she was ready to snap, the man in question spoke up, "Do you guys like Avril Lavigne?" He asked the group casually and Lisbon stamped on his foot from where she sat opposite him, he mouthed "Ow!" at her and she glared at him. The team appeared to miss all of this and answered his question, Rigsby made a snorting noise and a face as his answer, Cho shrugged and Van Pelt said, "I have her first two albums, why?"

Jane chuckled, "Lisbon likes 'Things I'll Never Say' She wants to marry me you know, what do you guys think of Agent Teresa Jane?"

Lisbon turned bright red and stood up from the table, "Van Pelt come with me we're going to watch the suspect, Rigsby talk to the waiter, I think he knows something. Cho, keep an eye on Jane." She ordered with a little more edge than she usually would and then she turned on her heel and left the café, Van Pelt mouthed 'help' at Rigsby who shrugged and then looking a little scared she hurried after Lisbon.

Jane laughed, "So what are we doing?" He asked Rigsby and Cho, Rigsby watched the direction that Lisbon had gone in, "I dunno, but I'm not talking to them, they scare me."

Jane grinned, "That's the man, can we go and find some rich people to wind up?" Jane asked as he craned his head to see if he could see any possible targets.

"Boss said to keep an eye on you." Cho said simply, but Jane just grinned, "Meh, Lisbon won't mind, she wants to marry me anyway." Jane said and then he grinned as a rich man walked past with a woman on each arm, "voila!" He exclaimed as he jumped up and headed towards the trio.

Rigsby looked at Cho in disbelief, annoyance and amusement all mixed into one, "Think if Lisbon married him he would behave more?" Rigsby asked hopefully.

"No chance." Cho replied as they walked over to grab Jane before he got arrested or punched.

"Worth a shot." Rigsby said with a grin and then came the sound of knuckles connecting with skin, another black eye for Patrick Jane. Why did he insist on doing such stupid things to himself?

Lisbon had gotten annoyed with Jane for being stupid and Rigsby for not doing what he was told and Cho for not keeping a good enough watch on Jane so they had all gotten yelled at and told to stay upstairs in the hotel room while she and Van Pelt solved the case.

By 5pm the 3 men were hungry and fed up, Jane was pissing off Rigsby and Cho was (as usual) calm on the outside, on the inside he had a strong urge to slap Jane and really hoped the Boss would come back soon.

As if in answer to his silent pleas the door opened and Lisbon walked in with Van Pelt behind her. She threw a fresh ice pack at Jane before throwing a bunch of menus in their general direction. With an air of superiority about her she took her jacket off and crossed her arms as she stared all 3 of them, she was tapping her foot and Jane couldn't suppress the laugh that came out of his mouth, she was acting like their mother.

"Jane, get into my hotel room now, I want a word with you." She said pointing to the door and raising his hands, still smirking a little Jane stood up, he waited until he was at the door to speak, "See you soon Mrs Jane."

With a dirty look after Jane who had just fled the room she turned to Cho and Rigsby, "I'm not really that annoyed with you guys, it was Janes fault, I just wanted to give Van Pelt more time on the field." She told them quietly, but changed the subject quickly when Van Pelt came into the room, "So order what you want on the menu and get noodles or something for Jane and me, I'm going to give him a written referral this time, maybe that will teach him something." With a nod at the boys and a small smile at Van Pelt she crossed the hall to her hotel room where Jane was sitting on her bed, still chuckling to himself in amusement.

"What the hell was that about earlier?" She asked him in all seriousness and he stopped chuckling, "What this?" He asked motioning to the ice pack he was holding to his face.

She resisted the urge to roll her eyes at him, "Yes _that._ You're lucky that he isn't filing charges, why did you feel the need to even bother him? He is entirely unrelated to the case!"

"I was bored." He shrugged and she sighed in annoyance, "Its not an excuse Jane! If I annoyed you every time I was bored you would be insane by now." She said with a sceptical look at him.

Jane grinned, "Maybe I am insane, but if I'm insane you must be too since you want to marry me and all."

Lisbon rolled her eyes, "I did not once say that I wanted to marry you!"

"Ah, but the song said it for you." Jane told her smirking, she shook her head in amusement as she advanced on him, "No it never, because you chose the wrong song." The look she was giving him unnerved him a little, but he stood his ground, "Don't lie to me Lisbon, of course it was the right song."

She just grinned, "You're not the only one with a good poker face Mr Jane." She said, "The song I was listening too this morning was "Nobody's Fool" which is rather convenient considering I fooled you good today."

He opened his mouth to make a snarky retort, but closed it again before saying anything, this only spurred Lisbon on, "Would you look at that Patrick Jane is speechless." She chuckled, "Well since you lost you don't get to take me to dinner so I guess I get to choose what to do."

She pulled out her handcuffs and for a second Janes eyes widened until he realised she had duct tape and had just handcuffed him to the bed, wondering why he had got excited for a moment he brushed it off as she finished chaining him to the bed and put the key in her pocket.

So that was how they had gotten to be here when their visitor decided to join them, Jane tied to the bed with duct tape on his mouth and Lisbon laughing as she stood with her hands on her hips watching him.

Neither of them even noticed the door opening, until they heard a voice behind them speak. "When I told you to keep him in line this wasn't quite what I had in mind."

Jumping a little Lisbon turned in horror to find Hightower standing at the door, she was raising an eyebrow at Lisbon, but to her relief seemed to be fighting back a smile, "However it seems to be working and it looks like it will keep him in one place." With a slight smile towards Jane Hightower addressed Lisbon once more, "Van Pelt caught the killer, the police escort has just taken him to the local prison, good call on your part giving her more time on the field, she'll make a good Special Agent some day. Your team might as well stay here the night. I'll see you back at the office on Monday." In her usual business-like manner without so much as a glance at Jane she strode out of the hotel room.

Lisbon looked at Jane and when their eyes meet they both burst out laughing, pitying him she took off the duct tape, but with a grin said, "You deserve the handcuffs, they're staying on."

"All night?" He asked, raising an eyebrow suggestively at her.

"Boss, foods here!" Rigsby called from across the hall, "You wish." She said with a smirk as she headed for the door, "I'll bring you some food over later, I hope you've learned your lesson Jane."

Still grinning she walked out of the room leaving him chained to the bed, he stared after her in shock for a few seconds before letting out a laugh, god she really was some woman and to think this had all started over an Avril Lavigne song, crazy.

The End! =]

A/N- I mixed my two favourite things, Avril Lavigne & Jisbon! Hoped you liked it!

The bits in italic are lyrics from Avril Lavigne songs, if you want to know what ones just message me!

xx


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